Uncle Tetsu's Japanese Bake

Bakery: Uncle Tetsu's Japanese Bake
Address: 596 Bay St, Toronto ON
Website: http://uncletetsu-ca.com/
Style: Japanese
Price: $$$ 

Not that I intentionally chronicle the latest Uncle Tetsu venture; it just happens that way. A few weeks ago, craving some green tea cheesecake (my favourite Tetsu product by a long shot), I went to the Matcha Cafe and found it closed. Shut down. My heart broke. Tetsu is expanding left, right and centre and they closed the best thing in their franchise!?! Furious, I went on their website and found that the Matcha Cafe was simply undergoing renovations. Not sure why, but now I see the reason: Uncle Tetsu did indeed shut down the Matcha Cafe and turned into a... cheese tart place. That means no matcha cheesecake, no matcha madeleines, no matcha soft serve -- you get the picture. WHY!? It makes no sense to get rid of the best products for a business dedicated exclusively to cheese tarts, which could be easily contained in a preexisting business or as a booth. Granted, Uncle Tetsu soon comforted distraught and angered customers by announcing yet another Tetsu business coming soon to the Greyhound station underpass, and it will feature all those green tea baked goods that were (so stupidly) discontinued in the first place. Hopefully.

So, what is the Japanese Bake? Essentially, it should have simply been called "Cheese Tarts" so as not to give people the idea that there is more to it than that. Cheese tarts seem to be the trendy dessert in Asia at the moment. You can think of them as a cross between Chinese egg tarts and dense New York-style cheesecake.

Uncle Tetsu's cheese tarts ($3.50 each) are made with homemade tart shells and a golden yellow filling that has a strangely glossy top, resembling melted mozzarella cheese. Coming with a pamphlet on how to eat them, you have the choice between fresh (room temperature upon purchase), heated up a bit, cooled in the fridge, or even frozen (?); the texture may change a bit, but the taste remains the same. The first bite transported me to my elementary school days, specifically those snack-packs with mini bread-sticks and cheddar "cheese" dip. Identical. These tarts are awkwardly sandwiched between sweet and savoury; the shells themselves are doughy and flavourless and would be more fitting for a quiche or meat pie. The cheese filling is bland and sticky; it clings to both mouth and fork like taffy while the squeaky top is too salty. Suffice to say, I was not a fan. Uncle Tetsu, what on earth were you thinking?!?

Rating: *1/2